Michael Jackson was whisked to a hospital emergency room this morning before the start of today's proceedings in his child molestation case.

Published reports indicate that Jackson was suffering from the flu, leading Judge Rodney Melville to postpone jury selection until next week.

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I heard this story on Neal Boortz's show on the way in this morning, and couldn't believe it. Not only that, The Talkmaster said that you could take a look at the original story if you didn't believe him (and he wouldn't be surprised if you didn't).

Unfortunately, the newspaper in question, the Columbus (GA) Ledger-Enquirer, demands you pay a buck or three for stories more than a week old. But thanks to the wonders of modern technology (and Google's cache), we've got the entire original story from the Columbus paper, and lo and behold if'n it ain't completely true!

On January 15, there was a Civil Rights march in commemoration of Martin Luther King's birthday. As you would expect, there were members of the local constabulary present to maintain the decorum of the crowds -- not unlike any other march or parade.

Enter one unidentified black woman who came to town for the march. She was shocked and appalled at what she found, and wrote a scathing letter to the mayor about the conduct of one particular police officer.

Did the officer say anything untoward? Nope. Didn't utter a word.

Did he brutalize anyone? Nope. Didn't touch a soul.

Not only that, Columbus Mayor Bob Poydasheff received glowing remarks about the helpfulness of the local constabulary during the march.

So what, pray tell, did this member of Columbus' Finest do to tick off the letter-writer?

He ate a banana.

And no, before you go there, he wasn't doing an imitation of the Spice Channel or the Playboy Channel, he was eating the banana the way anyone would: Peel it, take a bite, chew, swallow. Lather, rinse and repeat.

So what ticked her off about a banana-eating cop?

Well, it seems that in the context of the march, she took the officer's banana eating to imply an analogous racial slur relating black people to apes.

Such a comparison would not be uncommon in the parlance of racist propaganda, particularly in the old days. But these days that kind of talk is pretty rare -- and pretty obvious, too, when someone really means it.

So as racial slurs go, simply eating a banana now has to be considered rather subtle, for this particular area.

So the mayor reported back to the letter-writer that simple fact. And then he did something that I wouldn't have done to someone as idiotic as that.

He apologized.

The screeching lunatic demanded the apology in writing. So the mayor did.

Dated Jan. 22, it says: "As I said in our telephone conversation, I am sorry you found Columbus police officers eating bananas on the street when you arrived in Columbus for the protest. Let me assure you there was no intent to offend. The officers needed some nutrition after standing long hours on the street and they particularly needed the potassium available in bananas and some other fruits."

Later the mayor writes: "There was no thought of insulting or offending anyone and perhaps this was thoughtless on our part. In any case, let me offer my sincere apology for anything our officers may have done that gave offense to you or anyone else."

No one knows. She hasn't seen fit to contact anyone back who has inquired.

But between you, me and the gatepost? Go ahead. Enjoy your banana. And if you catch me at home on the right day, I might even treat you to some bananas from our fruit basket. Or maybe even, at the risk of earning her ire, eat one myself.

Posted by: mhking at 08:17 AM | Comments (32) | Add Comment
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My darling bride of nearly 20 years (She-who-must-be-obeyed) rolled her Jeep Wrangler Thursday morning. Which means that I spent most of the day Thursday in the Emergency Room.

Seems that as she was en route to work that someone tagged a car in the lane next to her, then sailed into her, sending her careening off of the roadway.

She's OK (thank God), but bumped, banged up, battered, and bruised six ways to Sunday. She gets to see a doctor tomorrow.

And that's only the middle of my journey through the gauntlet of last week. Earlier in the week, I had to put a water pump on MY car, and just before I received the phone call about Rachel's accident, I got the e-mail receipt for the bike rack I just bought for the back of her car.

Then, to add insult to injury, while running errands Friday (taking photos of the damaged car, going to the pharmacy to get her more drugs, going to the bank, paying the sitter, ad nauseum), I hopped out of the car for a quick stop. Three minutes later, I hopped back into the car, put the key in the ignition, and.....nothing.

The key wouldn't even turn.

I looked around to make sure I hadn't jumped into the wrong car by mistake, but no such luck.

I had to have it towed home (I wasn't about to leave it where it was), then Saturday morning, towed to the friendly, neighborhood Chrysler dealer. I'm still waiting for word on how bad the damage to my wallet will be.

When it rains, it pours. I guess. It's enough to make you shake your head and say, "Just damn."

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Providence, RI high school student Jeffrey Eden came up with the concept for his award-winning art project in about fifteen minutes. The project, entitled "Bush/Hitler and How History Repeats Itself," created a firestorm of controversy after it was displayed alongside other award-winning high school art projects last week.

The piece, titled "Bush/Hitler and How History Repeats Itself," triggered a complaint soon after it was displayed with other award-winning entries at Alperts Furniture Showplace in Seekonk last week.

"It's offensive to me," said Paul Lewis, a 34-year-old North Providence man.

Lewis asked Alperts to remove Eden's piece and phoned area newspapers as well as Channel 10 and Channel 6.

He said he sees zero relationship between the policies of President Bush and Hitler.

Figures of President Bush and Hitler, drawn on Popsicle sticks, are at the focal point of Eden's work. Each is addressing his own army of plastic soldiers.

On a backdrop, Eden has pasted statements of Hitler. He has penned a few of his own sentiments, too.

He hopes people will read them.

"Hitler's own justification was his own hatred," said one slogan.

"Treatment of the prisoners was unspeakable [concentration camps]," said another.

To the right of President Bush, Eden's handwriting said "No justification" and "Saddam had no affiliation with the Taliban and there are no weapons of mass destruction."

He thinks they show that the work is comparing Hitler and President Bush -- not equating them.

His teacher, Lynn Norton, believed he got his point across. She gave him an A.

Not that the moonbats care about insulting anyone on the right. That's par for the course for them.

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CNN's Eason Jordan has thrown in the towel amid the unsubstantiated remarks he made last month in Switzerland. Jordan claimed that US soldiers had purposefully targeted journalists in Iraq.

Jordan said he was quitting to avoid CNN being "unfairly tarnished" by the controversy.

During a panel discussion at the World Economic Forum (news - web sites) last month, Jordan said he believed that several journalists who were killed by coalition forces in Iraq had been targeted.

He quickly backed off the remarks, explaining that he meant to distinguish between journalists killed because they were in the wrong place where a bomb fell, for example, and those killed because they were shot at by American forces who mistook them for the enemy.

"I never meant to imply U.S. forces acted with ill intent when U.S. forces accidentally killed journalists, and I apologize to anyone who thought I said or believed otherwise," Jordan said in a memo to fellow staff members at CNN.

But the damage had been done, compounded by the fact that no transcript of his actual remarks has turned up. There was an online petition calling on CNN to find a transcript, and fire Jordan if he said the military had intentionally killed journalists.

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Dennis Rodman nude?

Just. Damn.

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A Sacramento couple, Steve and Virginia Pearcy, have politely hung a US military uniform from a tree in their front yard, with a sign dangling from it saying, "Your tax dollars at work."

Many neighborhood residents find the display offensive and disrespectful, while the Pearcy's insist they are utilizing their First Amendment right to free speech.

The homeowners behind the controversy are Steve and Virginia Pearcy. They released a statement saying, "There will always be people who are offended by political speech, and the most important forum of all ... is one's own residence. The First Amendment is meaningless unless dissent is allowed."

Councilman Rob Fong pointed out that what the couple is doing is protected as free speech, saying, "Unfortunately or fortunately this is protected speech by the First Amendment ... so there is nothing we can do about it."

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Stefano Hatfield, media critic of the UK's Guardian newspaper, was not happy with Budweiser's Super Bowl ad honoring returning GI's -- and neither did his neighbor.

It was described as "moving" and "powerful" by the obsequious Fox critics, and "obscene" by my furious upstairs neighbour who called me straight after because he regarded the spot as incitement to war with Iran, and knows I write about such things and so it was of course my fault.

Pass the sick bag, Alice. I was too stunned by the spot to really take in the full import of a beer company waving off "our boys" (and girls) to battle. But battle? Where? The war in Iraq's over, isn't it or so they keep telling us? With Rice's thinly veiled threats towards Iran everywhere, it is hard not to see the spot as anything other than hailing the troops off to war. Pure propaganda, and it picked up on one of the themes of the night: patriotism.

Secondly, what did he expect the fellow travelers to do, spit on the troops?

Then again, the liberal Guardian hates the Administration and anything that we find patriotic. But they're not here. They don't -- or do not choose to -- understand. That's their loss. And our gain.

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It seems that the term "Nazi" is thrown around so casually these days, usually to describe those of us on the right, without regard to the true meaning of the word.

Former comedienne and Air America radio host Janeane Garofalo called Congressional Representatives and Senators who displayed a blue-tinged finger in support of the Iraqi vote at last week's State of the Union Nazis in comparing their salute to the stiff-armed "Heil Hitler" salute used during the second World War. Members of Democratic Underground and liberal bloggers alike cynically compared the patriotic salutes at this past weekend's Super Bowl in Jacksonville to the Nazi displays of nationalism at the 1936 Summer Olympics in Berlin.

Many leftists casually toss out the term "Nazi" as an epithet to describe those of us on the right in general and the Bush Administration in particular.

Samantha over at Uncle Sam's Cabin takes a closer look at the phenomenon and points out the overall fallacy of the term's use in that vein.

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Controversial University of Colorado instructor Ward Churchill, who is still in lots of hot water over statements comparing the victims of the 9/11 disaster to Nazis, has proclaimed that he will speak tonight on the University's campus in Boulder, despite the cancellation of a planned gathering at the University's Memorial Center.

Officials with the university sited security concerns as the reason for cancelling the speech inside the University Memorial Center. Supporters then vowed to fight for a court-ordered injunction to allow Churchill to speak. A hearing on the injuction is set for 4 p.m. in Denver Federal court.

No matter what happens in court, supporters say, Churchill will speak tonight outside the University Memorial Center at 7 p.m.

Those who support Churchill say CU is restricting the professor's right to free speech.

"They can expect to hear what I actually said, and the implications of how the media's been spinning it," Churchill said, referring to the content of his speech.

As for what Churchill says, he's just plain pathetic and completely wrong. But he's got a Constitutional right to be wrong.

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Jeremy Reynalds, director of the New Mexico homeless shelter Joy Junction, and a regular contributor to several anti-Islamic terror forums, has been targeted for assassination.

Christian journalist and long-time friend of Internet Haganah, Jeremy Reynalds has been targeted for killing by Islamists on the Al Ansar forum (ansarnet.ws).

The thread:

http://www.ansarnet.ws/vb/showthread.php?t=27276

In a thread on the Houston-based site, the person who ran the now-defunct mawsuat.com site starts by blaming Reynalds for the site's demise, posts a POBox address for Reynalds, and asks if anyone else has more information about him.

In the discussion that follows, the Islamists first post Reynald's home address so that he might be "visited", then a picture of him and a wish that his ribs should be broken, and finally they offer their prayers to Allah that He should deliver to them Reynald's "fatty neck" - a clear reference to the current fad of decapitating anyone deemed to be a critic of the more lethal forms of Islam.

The thread closes with a heartfelt "amen".

The forum site which includes the threats is housed at a US-based internet firm, Everyone's Internet of Houston.

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Am I the only one who has a fundamental problem with this site's wares?

So how many folks are going to rush out to spend a thousand dollars or more to get spinning teeth to go with the spinners on their tires?

Just damn!

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USA Today ran their annual "Ad Watch" of the ads that ran during last night's Super Bowl this morning, and though many commercials were pretty lame to begin with (was I the only one that thought the Subway steamed windows commercial was simply pathetic?), there were some major standouts.

The biggest standout for many was the Anheuser-Busch ad honoring soldiers returning home to spontaneous applause in an airport (View the ad at A-B's "Hero Salute" site). Many leftist blogs are decrying that ad, along with the NFL's salute to the troops prior to the start of the game, and comparing the overall sentiment and feeling to...(c'mon, say it with me)...Nazi Germany in 1936.

Other stand-out ads included the Bud Light ad featuring a skydive instructor tossing a six-pack out of a plane as an enticement to a reluctant diver -- only to have the pilot take off out of the plane after it.

Super Bowl first-time advertiser (and halftime show sponsor) Ameriquest ran two ads, the first featuring a man on a cellphone getting beaten into submission by the proprietors of a convenience store after they mistakenly overhear the man say "You're being robbed." The second featured a man fixing dinner for his wife, and picking up the cat that had knocked over a pot of tomato sauce...while holding a butcher knife in the other hand, as the wife (or girlfriend - it could have been either one) walked into the apartment.

The usual round of upcoming motion picture ads were present, and included new footage for Batman Begins, Sahara, and War of the Worlds. I was surprised that neither Star Wars Episode III nor Fantastic Four were represented last night.

Overall though, the ads were pretty dismal as compared to past years -- good thing there was a fairly exciting game to balance them against.

iFilm has collected all the ads together for you to watch online.

Update: The NY Times slings mud at the A-B troops coming home ad.

A gauzy valentine to American troops, which ended with the Anheuser-Busch corporate logo superimposed on screen, was touching, but some viewers may have wondered whether "Busch" had been misspelled.

Update 2:GoDaddy.com CEO Bob Parsons reports on his own blog that Fox yanked their second scheduled ad last night, at the behest of the NFL.

As you may have noticed our Super Bowl ad only appeared during the scheduled first quarter spot. It was scheduled to run also in the second ad position during the final two minute warning. Our ad never ran a second time. Instead, in its place, we saw an advertisement promoting "The Simpsons."

The NFL persuaded FOX to pull our ad.

We immediately contacted Fox to find out what happened. Here's what we were told: After our first ad was aired, the NFL became upset and they, together with Fox, decided to pull the ad from running a second time. Because we purchased two spots, we were also entitled to a "Brought to you by GoDaddy.com" 5 second marquis spot. They also chose to pull the marquis spot.

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It's time. All the practice and drills and scrimmages and films have all led to this.

From 32 teams in the hunt back at Canton in August, to two in Jacksonville tomorrow.

Will the New England Patriots cement a dynasty like the Steelers in the 70s, the 49ers in the 80s or the Cowboys in the 90s? Or will the Philadelphia Eagles bring a championship home to a city long wanting?

The Patriots have a 7 point edge, but I'm going to take the Eagles (and the points). I'm a long-time NFC (and NFL before that) fan. Besides -- they beat up on the Falcons two weeks ago, they deserve it.

Enjoy the game everyone; enjoy the commercials, and remember that if you miss 'em, the commercials will be rebroadcast on an NFL Network special tomorrow night, and again both Monday and Tuesday.

I'm almost ready - I'm making homemade pizzas and homemade hot wings. I can justify it - I'll be back on my diet Monday.

Wrong network, but the question always applies: "Are you ready for some football?"

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Air America talk show host and actress Janeane Garofalo continues to sink deeper into mediocrity, this time with a shrill declaration on MSNBC's After Hours that the members of the House and Senate that raised their fingers after having dipped them into blue ink, in solidarity with the voters of Iraq, are like Nazis rasing their arms at Adolph Hitler.

"The inked fingers and the position of them, which is gonna be a 'Daily Show' photo already, of them signaling in this manner [does the Nazi salute], as if they have solidarity with the Iraqis who braved physical threats against their lives to vote as if somehow these inked-fingered Republicans have something to do with that. And also, the bit of theater about the very distraught parents of the soldier who had died, the point is not if this was a real moment, if it was staged, if it was PR. The point is, is those parents and their son were misled about why that young man went into Iraq. And when he wrote a letter to his mother saying, 'It's my job to protect you now,' protect her from what? The imminent threat of Saddam Hussein and his weapons of mass destruction? So don't bring up, 'Is it helpful if the Democrats make some noise' when they're being lied to. That's not helpful, that's not helpful to pundits like you maybe, but it is not helpful to the country when a Republican President and his partisan Republican Party continue to perpetuate myth and dishonesty on the country."

Somebody needs to e-mail Janeane and let her know that she stopped being funny quite awhile ago.

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"Selling Their Birthright to the GOP" screams the headline from the Los Angeles Times.

The venerable newspaper then allows two Southern California ministers rip into black conservative Christian ministers who would dare to support the Bush Administration in a hit piece that goes beyond the pale. And why? Because they don't toe the proverbial line that liberals insist that blacks toe.

Seventy pastors apparently turned out for Tuesday's meeting, which was supposedly organized by conservative black ministers who had backed George W. Bush in November and who are seeking to promote what they say is a new agenda for the black community.

Are they doing it with programs that bring jobs, education and opportunity? Nooooooooooooo. They are doing it with a campaign against gay marriage. They are unveiling a "black contract with America on moral values." That's right, Newt Gingrich is back and he's black!

That the ideological descendants of the architects of Jim Crow would be setting up shop in inner cities to structure a solution to the problems of being black in America is beyond ludicrous.

The saddest part is that these ministers, who have inherited a legacy of respect, leadership and authority, would squander their profound birthright for a bowl of faith-based porridge. The underbelly of this Republican initiative is the promise of funding for church programs. That's a true sellout.

The black church has always stood with the oppressed and never the oppressor. It has not been in the forefront of the "pro-life" movement because it recognized that prohibiting abortions leads to the maiming and death of thousands of poor, often black, women. It has not been in the forefront of the movement against gay marriage because it doesn't adhere to the biblical literalism of many fundamentalist churches and looks more to the compassion of Jesus than to conservative legalism.

The authors, in feeding into that sort of hatred, apparently agree that there should only be one school of thought in black America - one that begs for handouts, as opposed to providing a moral compass.

But let me ask: Isn't there truly room for multiple schools of thought in black America? Isn't there room for those who find that gay marriage is offensive to their sensibilities in addition to those who might otherwise support gay marriage? Many of us on the conservative side of the aisle think that out of a diversity of opinion can come strength in the community. Apparently, the authors of this hit piece feel otherwise. And that's a sad state of affairs, indeed.

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I've always had a soft spot for Ossie Davis' work. With his work and life partner, his wife Ruby Dee, they have always portrayed good, distinctive work and have done work that would touch your soul.

Ossie Davis died today in his hotel room in Miami, where he was making a film called Retirement..

Ossie Davis' long career both in front of and behind the camera was exemplerary for a number of reasons, not the least of which is his long-standing relationship with Ruby Dee. When other show business relationships falter quickly, Davis and Dee's withstood the test of time. Indeed, he will be missed by many.

Ossie Davis was 87.

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The American Indian Movement Grand Governing Council in Minneapolis issued a release this week pointing out that Universtiy of Colorado Professor Ward Churchill, who has earned the ire of many Americans by calling the victims of the 9/11 terrorist attacks "little Eichmanns" (referring to World War II Nazi thug Adolph Eichmann), is not a true American Indian.

ChurchillÂ’s statement that these people deserved what happened to them, and calling them little Eichmanns, comparing them to Nazi war criminal Adolf Eichmann, who implemented Adolf HitlerÂ’s plan to exterminate European Jews and others, should be condemned by all.

The sorry part of this is Ward Churchill has fraudulently represented himself as an Indian, and a member of the American Indian Movement, a situation that has lifted him into the position of a lecturer on Indian activism. He has used the American Indian MovementÂ’s chapter in Denver to attack the leadership of the official American Indian Movement with his misinformation and propaganda campaigns.

Ward Churchill has been masquerading as an Indian for years behind his dark glasses and beaded headband. He waves around an honorary membership card that at one time was issued to anyone by the Keetoowah Tribe of Oklahoma. Former President Bill Clinton and many others received these cards, but these cards do not qualify the holder a member of any tribe. He has deceitfully and treacherously fooled innocent and naïve Indian community members in Denver, Colorado, as well as many other people worldwide. Churchill does not represent, nor does he speak on behalf of the American Indian Movement.

The vandals painted the swastikas on the tailgate of Churchill's Chevrolet pickup late Tuesday or early Wednesday, said Lt. Phil West, a sheriff's spokesman. He said deputies told him that Churchill's truck was parked in front of his home when the vandals struck.

Also Wednesday, Churchill turned over to deputies copies of "hate mail" he said he had received. Churchill told the deputies he already had provided the hate mail to the CU campus police, West said.

I'm sure local folks in the Denver area will make him feel welcome (rolling eyes).

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After trying to off himself (it didn't work), R&B singer Houston did the next best thing: he gouged his eye out.

According to sources, the singer first attempted to jump out of a London hotel window last Thursday. Prevented from doing so by his security staff, Houston was locked in his room, at which time the injury occurred. No additional details as to his current condition or whereabouts have been disclosed.

Featured in a McDonald's commercial, Houston's 2004 hit single "I Like That" peaked at No. 11 on the Hot 100 singles chart. The song also featured Chingy, Nate Dogg and I-20.

Houston's debut album, "It's Already Written," has sold 208,000 units to date, according to Nielsen SoundScan, having peaked at No. 14 on The Billboard 200.

No word on why he became so self-destructive.

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John Vernon, veteran character actor best remembered as Dean Wormer in the 1978 classic Animal House has died. Saskatchewan -native Vernon played the perennial bad guy in movies from The Outlaw Josey Wales to Dirty Harry to Airplane II and television guest roles up through and including CSI.

Vernon was most recently seen in the special follow-up feature add-on to the "Double Secret Probation" Special Edition DVD of Animal House, which showed where the characters would be today. Dean Wormer was shown as a wheelchair-bound crochety old man in a nursing home.

John Vernon was 72, but nobody picked him; or scored on him in the Dead Pool.

I guess we're finally off of double-secret probation now.

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